maryam anak syurga

a woman 2 years younger than me
yet way wiser than i am
thus
how would i justify my deed
and how would i provide defenses, if any
in front of Him
on that day?

maryam anak syurga

randomness

don't know when it started
but being able to see you
give me sense of happiness

photograph: by ed.

how can this be so beautiful?

we keep this love in a photograph 

we made this memories for ourselves 

where eyes are never closing 

our hearts are never broken

our time's forever frozen

 still.

cinta.

bismillah. semoga tulisan ini tidak menjadi fitnah kepadaku kelak.

dramatik sungguh tajuk post ni kan? ok hambar.

tadi aku pergi tesco dgan member.

sebelum pergi tu act perut mmg memulas2. diarrhea la kan. sebelum pegi ak ingt da abis.

rupenye2 belum. so sesampainye di tesco, 2-3 kali jugak aku meluangkan masa di tandas.

tp hampa. abdominal cramping but nothing out. surprise.

the thing is aku sgt kejar masa wktu tu. sbb ak kene beli keperluan camping for final year ppd camp which akan bermula at 2pm and by that time da 12.30. tolak mase ak spent kat dlm toilet lg.

lalu aku pun berdoa. senjata umat islam kan doa. free je dan mujarab.

lebih kurg mcm ni la bunyi doa aku 'Ya Allah sakit cirit birit ni kalau biar dalam badan makin poisoning. oleh itu ya Allah, kau tangguhkanlah sakit ni smpai ak habis beli barang keperluan camping. amin,"

bismillahi tawakkaltu alAllah.

dah subhanallah. sakit itu hilang on the spot.Allahurabbi ak pon meneruskan aktiviti shoping mcm biase smp setel. syukur, siap boleh lunch lagi.

then waktu luncheon tu aku bgtau member aku smbil tersenyum.

"tadi aku ckp dgn Allah.."

"hah?" -

"tadi aku ckp dgn Allah..mintak dgn Allah. mintak cinta aku tangguhkan dulu sakit perut ni smp aku habis beli brg camping. 

"baguslah. hehe." member aku sengih je

habis je ktorg luncheon, lagi bbrp langkah nak balik, sakit perut memulas tu dtg balik. heavy pye sakit. ak tau ak mmg kene berlari ke tandas. smp tandas alhamdulillah. Allah permudahkan. Cinta aku bg segala poison tu senang je kluar smoothly melalui saluran pencernaan aku. alhamdulillah alhamdulillah.

setel je aku terus jpe mmber aku. smbil sengih aku ckap dlm gurauan..

"tadi aku doa tak habis, ak mintak kat Allah supaya tangguhkan sakit perut ni smp ak habis beli barang.. sepatutnye aku mintak supaya sakit perut ni setel kite smpai ktdi sana nuu.."

member aku senyum je.. nak balas ape lg kan.

pendek kate aku nak kate kat sini, kebergantungan kepada Allah tu yg paling utama. bila kita letakkan 100% kebergantungan  (faith) pada yang Maha Esa, in sha Allah kite tak akan rasa susah sikit pun. dan ya, itulah cinta. cinta yg paling utama. cinta yg paling agung. Allah bagi apa yg kita mintak sedangkan kita ni kadang2 solat pn bila nak habis waktu. rasa malu sgt. even Allah bg kita apa yg kita tak mintak. subhanallah.

dan cinta. tajuk post ni cinta. bile kau ckp kau cintakan seseorang krn Allah, sebenarnye kite kene tgok hidden meaning behind that bro (and sis of course). adakah frasa itu sekadar penyedap ayat atau betul2 memaknai maksud di sebalik frasa tu? sebelum mencintai seseorg kerana Allah, kita kene cintai Allah dulu. kite kene cintai kekasih Allah yakni Rasulullah (SAW). dan bagaimana mencintai Allah kalau kita x kenal Cinta kita? mcm mana nak cintai Rasulullah kalau surah kegemaran Rasulullah (SAW) kite tak tau? mcm mana nak cinta kalau tak kenal?

aku tak suke kurma. aku tak suke madu. tapi sekarang aku belajar makan kurma, makan madu hari2 sebab aku tau itu sunnah. Rasullullah (SAW) suka. aku tau Rasulullah suka surah al-A'la dan automatik surah tu antara surah kegemaran aku. pendek kata aku belajar suka sesuatu sebab ak tau Rasulullah suka, dan aku nak sukakan apa yg Rasulullah (SAW) suka, sbb aku nak belajar cintakan dia. bila kita buat apa yg Allah suka, apa yg sunnah, kita akan lebih kenal siapa Pencipta kita, siapa pemberi syafaat di masyar nnt, dan lama kelamaan perasaan cinta tu akan datang dengan sendirinya tanpa dipaksa. adat la kan tak kenal maka x cinta?

i used to bro. i used to use that phrase too. that ultimate phrase yg buat kite nmpk mcm baik.yang mghalalkan apa2 yg bertakuk dlm hati - 'aku syg kau krn Allah,'ak ckp kat semua org. kat kawan, famili.  but that's just it. aku cakap tanpa sebarang maksud. even if there was, it wasn't deep and meaningful. it was just portraying me saying something i wanted to, without really mean it. and even now, it wasn't deep enough but at the very least it wasn't as superficial as before. it wasn't just a phrase. well to be exact, mungkin bile ckp mcm tu kau mmg sayaannnggggg kat org tu but frasa 'kerana Allah', this is wayy more than words bro. 

bile kau sukekan seseorang, cntakan seseorang usually kau akan cube kenal die deeper kan. belajar pasal die, apa yg die suke ape yg die tak suke. stalk fb die. pernah dgn mirror effect? we tend to mirror what our loved one do. so sume org tahu bende ni kan. cinta. jadi aplikasikanlah. untuk mencintai Allah dan Rasulullah (SAW), zikir pada Allah dan Rasullulah (SAW), buat ape yg Allah suke, buat perkara2 sunnah, bace sirah baca kisah sahabat, tadabbur Al Quran, sedekah. mcm2 lagi. 

sebab kita nak belajar mencintai Cinta.

mencintai Cinta paling utama sebelum cinta2 yg lain.

kerana cinta itu bukan sekadar cinta. bukan sekadar endorphine yg mengalir dlm darah2 bile kau nampak aku dan aku nampak engkau. tidak. sekali kali tidak.

dan cinta itu bukanlah semudah ucapan di bibir 'aku cintakan engkau kerana Allah'.

cinta itu hanya valid sbg cinta bile kau kau berpaksikan Dia dan hanya Dia

cinta itu cinta bila kau nak bersama dia hingga ke Syurga

dearest future sons & daughters :)

-copied-

A very very cute story:
My Daughter was 12 years old and prayer was like heavy burden on her, So I told her to pray one day and I monitored her. She took the carpet and threw it on the ground. I asked her if she prayed - she said yes - Believe me, without feeling I slapped her face - I know I made a mistake. The situation has troubled me and I cried and I repent to God to forgive me.. The slap, the talk, the reminders did not make a difference to my child.

One day A friend told me a story. She went to one of her friends for a visit. Her friend was not very religious, but when the Adhan prayer was called, her children rushed for prayers without reminders or quarrel. I said to her how does your
children pray
on themselves without quarrel or a reminder? She said, before I got married I used to pray this Dua and stil pray it today.

After she told me the Dua, I began to recite in my prayers and anytime I could. Since I began to recite the Dua my daughter is now the first to prayer without reminders or quarrels. She got up in Fajr prayers without an alarm. And all her brothers are now eager in praying without any difficulties.

I know You are now eager to know this Supplication Dua..

The Supplication is in Surah Ibrahim 14:40.

And the Supplication is...

( رَبِّ ٱجۡعَلۡنِى مُقِيمَ ٱلصَّلَوٰةِ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِى‌ۚ رَبَّنَا وَتَقَبَّلۡ دُعَآءِ (٤٠

"Rabbi-Ajal'ni muqeema salaati, wa min thurriyyati, Rabbana wataqabbal duaa"

O my Lord! make me one who establishes regular Prayer, and also (raise such) among my offspring O our Lord! and accept Thou my Prayer.

Aameen..

Start today do not wait until you get
married and until you have
kids, prevention is better than cure.

Spread the knowledge so it will be Sadqa-e-Jaaria for you and for me... ان شاء الله .

hi awak. kite doa same2 eh? :)

random

hi nadwa
kalau kau nak lelaki yg solat awal waktu
kau pun kena solat awal waktu gak
simple

kan Allah dah cakap awal2
lelaki yg baik untuk perempuan yg baik, n the other way round

:)

justify

heart sinking
jaw dropping
mind bargaining
in justification
this unconstrained jealousy over something that is not or will never be mine
served as a wake up call
i'm perfectly fine with others, really!
but of course, out of numerous numbers of human, yeah it has to be her.
it always has to be her