kuku

kuku
i hate the ideology
that somehow someone has implanted the whole idea about it inside my brain
unintendedly
and how it lingers in my mind even at the time i hate the most
i hate the fact that how it doesn't matter to thee
and how huge the deal was to me
somehow this is burdensome
and i was trapped, suffocated
in this whole kuku thing
the most tragic part is
i could do nothing about it

kuku
something stupid that is ironically, so true

not enuff quorum. TWPUKM-UNPAD 2010

le girls.

and then there's me thinking will there be somebody who can read my nonverbal mind, understand my complete silenece & make love to my thoughts? 

time capsul

i am afraid that i might be hoarding hope
at some point
bits by bits has somehow brought whatever this is to the surface
i am worried of the reality check that will hit me through
once we've had travel far enough to that stage
and i will have no chance of looking back
rendering all those memories, reminiscing
wondering what could have been and could have not be
and  'what if' is the least I want to hear

so i keep myself safe and sound off my limit
before things are getting way too worse
and all left was never-ending regret of not dealing with this earlier
brush it off like evening breeze calmly blow the sand
nonchalantly

but still things are easier said than done
when time has stopped and punished me with that very sentence
when it was real and never a prophylaxis sanity as before
where at that moments onward a barricade has to be mounted
and primed was the only word i wished to dance in my brain

who is abam apam & OPNS?

so i would like to meet this 2 rising webtoon drawer (?) who are they?. 

what do i expect?
and yes, the least important i am, almost listless
im sure of it now

word salad

okay, so ceritanya ak skrg tgh diligentnye menyiapkan saki baki famili case study untuk fammed ni.
simple je sebenanye. tp aku tak tau knape. to begin with, ak jarang stress tapi tgh2 buat tiba-tiba aiyak mata ni kluar mencurah2. dan aku buat benda yg ak tak sll buat, tulis dlm blog ni. weird. im so weird. even waktu aku tgh taip ni pon, air mata aku dok kluar lagi.

what? biasela tu perempuan nangis. no it's not common to me. nangis tanpa sbb. or is this the effect hormone. and yes ak jarang stress. but this time aku midly stress. why? ok this is weird but im writing this down. don't judge me this is physiological. my period has been delayed for 11 days!! okay org akan ckp, chill la. ok this so weird to me considering that i have a regular period so this 11 days of period of amenorrhea is bothering me quite big. this is my very first time, biase kalau delay pn paling lame 3 hari dan i have quite a record on that. -_________-. im so so so risau right now. i told this to my friend, they said i'd probably been so stress which brought this issue to the surface. fair enough, ya Rabb pls grant me healthiness T.T

am i  being weirdo to bring this whole thing up? did i sound weird poiting this up particularly.. ohh Lord. even now, i felt like crying. it's so weird i probably need scenery therapy right now. having said that, scenery therapy means something related to the rain, sky, stars, moon, ocean anyyythinggg will do.

okay everyone i hope you guys will never read this. this is so peculiar even for me. but but i just need to post this. i have to. in case you're wondering, no im not depress. i just have mood issue right now and im dealing it by writing all this down.

in case somebody read this, please pray that my period will return to normal and my healthiness. thank you. much appreciated

world

strange but true enough
some beings
even if you intended not to like these certain someone
you couldn't
because due to several reasons,which was simply unexplainable

but in a sense of way
if you were to look closer and deeper
of course not the fake superficial 'layer' that one might have shown you
you have to peel it off nonchalantly
sooner or later
at one point you'll eventually find that exquisite value
exist in each and everyone's heart
no matter how vague and indistinct they were
you just have to look inside thoroughly
right through the heart carefully
filled with love and positivity, without judgement or hatred

.
and then we can live in a better world
you me
and everyone

midnightoil

can't believe i still stalk you sometimes
dah jadi tunang orang pun
move on dude
ba.ha.ha.

nah here's a song i dedicated to you
so if i were to bump into you somehow
i'll get to sing this part to you



may you have a blissful marriage till jannah