.

over my head

it will be good if i get to walk alone like how i usually did back then when i was still in bandung.

now everything seems far & faded away

there was a time i stood alone at the roundabout somewhere in mulana

thinking how i would miss this moment when it ends

and stand back at the balcony

watching the blue sky with fluffy cotton candy clouds

or sometimes on purpose walking leisurely outside

when it rain

to feel, to hear, and to see the rain

with no worries. without any other else to accompany me

it feels right that way

but not here

i am afraid to walk alone

i feel suffocated, the outside world are cruel and horrible

not saying that there were no crimes at jatinangor

but it feels much safer there

i could go alone and return alone

i could be independent on myself

now i could only stand

beside the windows pane

turning on my most favourite songs on the playlist

withe a cup of tea on the table

looking out right through the window

but still being aware of strangers outside

waiting for the rain

and smiling.

joted.

since i could'nt bring myself to sleep lately, i think it's probably because of i spend too much time sleeping in the evening. and i'm wide awake at night. this is not healthy, technically. and i woke up to find out someone inbox me.

and never once this crossed my mind. anak andy flop poppy msg ak weh. lol. actually, i was the one who sent  message to him first, but as lame as what i wrote, i never thought he actually cared to reply. don't worry, the message wasn't that typical of what girl(s) fan usually came up with, it was more to advices from a sister to her little brother though. :)

guess that's all. oh yeah, here in cheras, it rain almost everyday in the evening, which kind of giving me that soothing feeling enwrapped in calmness and serenity. i really love it the fact that i could look out of the window, and watch the downpouring rain, and sometimes put my palm outside just to feel the beads. it was a definite beautiful. in some points, it reminds me of how it actually felt in bandung, back then. :)

i'm done with too much writing. gotta sahur now. assalamualaikum :)